Wow, I had an experience with Microsoft customer service that was a revelation. For six months information was diligently collected and processed, multiple case ids were issued all with the promise of going to the "Escalation Department". Mind you the Escalation department was not tech support, we were deep, deep in the machine of people mover bureaucracy.

But it is no fun, even for a bureaucracy, to keep issuing case ids and not be able to tag them as closed at some point. For this creative stories--so creative they should have been able to solve the problem--are required.  The first 'close' story contradicted the error message entirely and got tagged as a media download issue, not our department. As the answer was made up, there is in fact no department that can solve the problem.  How, then, to get out of the loop?

The mission was to go back to customer service, force another "escalation" and find a way to tech support. The key was to make sure that responses could not match anything on their checklist. Every question they ask is designed to elicit a key word, so you can be filed away again. I had to get my colleague to assist with this because it was like a chess match. One wrong comment and you were back to square one--the old childhood game of Shoots and Ladders. Finally, we got a call from tech support. After six months of diligent phone calls and emails, it turned out this was a known problem that took only several minutes to fix!

Some time ago we had a server outage issue with Cable Vision in New York that affected our customers in one neighborhood of Brooklyn. This was a very specific issue but we could not get past tech support that told you to unplug your modem and count to ten. In this case, they promised you the "red board". Desperate, we contacted Cable Vision corporate and reached the head network operating center of Cable Vision corporate in Atlanta. She immediately understood what was required to solve the issue and laughed out loud when we told her our difficulty getting assistance in New York. She tried on our behalf--and she was told to unplug her modem. The head Unix system administrator for Cable Vision corporate was not laughing anymore.

These are all tricks to try and find the real people who can help you which are veiled behind customer service. On this Hallow Eve, I hope for the passing of the customer service graveyard duty that not only are customers subjected to, but countless people who have this terrible job. Sometimes it is difficult to solve a problem, but let's at least address the nut of the problem, rather than causing a bigger one in its place.

We (I) often complain about the horrors of plane travel--the pantomime of security, the overhead and checked bags weight and size contradictions, sardine seating arrangements etc., but in a comedian's bit I heard once-when you are strapped into a 89 ton steel can 30,000 feet in sky going 500 miles per hour, whether your croissant is stale or not should not be an issue.

With a little perspective, we need not take for granted such remarkable achievements.

The tales of woe that I get when someone's computer has to go to the shop for a week--there is no remuneration large enough for the catastrophe and angst of a hard drive (that after ten years) has died.

We have lost that tingling excitement and anticipation of new technology--the hard won discoveries. After a year of having an iphone, my parents the other night discovered why their phone would not ring--it turned out the silencer was on. While a good tip is to read the instructions thoroughly, for them, this turned out to be a fantastic discovery. Their life became a bit better, in fact, a cause for celebration.

We cannot enjoy anything if we are inpatient and expectant. If you always expect and want, you will never have the enjoyment of receiving. The difference between "Oh, the book I ordered has arrived. How wonderful." "Oh, finally, the book arrived."

We are in a remarkable situation, every time a new system lands another one is created. It is estimated that 4 exabytes of unique information is generated every year. It is true mastery--you are never done mastering. I believe in the Zen of technology. Those that enjoy and appreciate are constantly rewarded, while those that resist and expect any of it to actually be built just for them cannot.

I encourage this approach for myself. Thankfully for all us, Shunru Suzuki explains in Zen Mind Beginner's Mind, the beginner is the enlightened one. 

 In July NAWBO held a social networking workshop that was geared for getting your feet wet in thecial networking arena. NAWBO-NYC is the National Association of Women Business Owners-NYC Chapter  an organization that has been helpful to me in New York meeting and learning from other women business owners. Squidoo, real space, power diggers, twitpic...we had to create a wiki to keep up! I have since received notifications of fan pages, linked-in networks and twitter feeds from quite a few of the participants using these tools to promote their business. We are hosting a continuation on Oct. 8, 2009, Storytelling and Social Media for Business Owners:
How To Create Compelling Content and Market Your Business, Blogging, which I hope you can attend.

While, we plunged into a fast paced river at the workshop, I was encouraged by the panelists suggestion that the best way to venture forward is to join some of these networks as a participant, a follower, a reader, an audience. Basically, you don't have to create your own following and group, but you can just go and social network.

Passing out business cards at a cocktail reception might get a few referrals, but blog, website, social networks + a google search opens your reach exponentially. And, vice versa. Now I am subscribed to more blogs, twitter accounts, newsletters, and groups than I care to disclose at the moment. I add all my forays and online encounters to my google home page feed, which has become a bizarre hodgepodge of technology, news, media, marketing, mommy blogger posts, client blog posts, latest historical novel updates, and astrology feeds. Does Google share home page feeds--what strange profile would I fall into for advertisers? What solicitations would I start receiving if I joined the Hannah Montana fan club....

Marshal McLuhan's Laws of Media are often foreboding, but his adages still hold true on the web: "We shape our tools and thereafter our tools shape us." 

Currently, we are at a technology crossroad and it is our job to shape these tools for our best interests. First we must define public and private space and second all this data mining and information should evolve to suit the growth of business.

 Michael Netzley, from Singapore University explains: "All technology innovations go through an adoption cycle. There are four steps in this process.

First, there's a trigger which compels somebody to invent and release the technology, followed by an enthusiastic early adoption phase. After that there's a trough of disillusionment as early adopters tire of the new technology, and finally, a plateau of productivity where the tool is widely adopted and used by average citizens working and living in life's mainstream.

Indeed, the tools have been around for a while and have been hyped, but the reality is that we are just now seeing mainstream adoption." (2009/9/2)

 As users of new technology it is up to us to tell the programmers how we want to use these new tools. Did not the use of the car for family lead to the creation of the min van? Truly, no auto engineer would have conceived of the mini van without consumer demand.

Programmers are digital engineers. They can make the internet run, but what a programmer does online is not likely how you and I want to navigate and use the web. When I asked a client once what kind of reporting they need for their database, the response was you figure out what we need. Well, it does not exactly work this way.  If it were up to programmers to determine efficiency of web use, we would be using Terminal and c prompt commands, rather than a web browser. (Actually, given all the problems with browsers these days, maybe this is not a bad idea.)

First, adaptation: Defining Public and Private Space--the ethical use of the web

It must be understood that all social networking sites-facebook, linked-in, myspace, blogger, youtube, etc own your data and can use it however they want. Of late, Facebook has received the most controversy. In August Canada's Privacy Commissioner called Facebook to task demanding changes to its privacy policy.(2009/08/08)  Some argue, there is no more privacy, get over it.

The "get over it argument" dismisses important ethical concerns that must be acknowledged by anyone that uses these platforms. And, no we don't need to get over it. These sites have created platforms whose profit is earned by our content. And, just like a building contractor must make sure a building will not collapse, management of social networking sites should make sure their users are safe. If the management is not giving away user data, than hackers are. A compromised social networking site has the potential to infect and glean user data information through hackers and viruses that can impact millions of people and cripple a business.

In a February CIO conference social networking dangers were exposed in the most prominent social networking sites. As the security agent Moyer explained, the climate is a perfect storm of social engineering and bad programming: "Social networking sites are meant to get as many users in one place as possible on one platform, and for attackers there's a lot of return-on-investment in going after them," (2009/07/02)

 And, Twitter has lots of work to be done on the security front from phishing attacks  to denial of service attacks , poor authentication systems . I don't mean to pick on Twitter, I love Twitter's potential, but even Forbes Magazine has pointed out,  for goodness sake, at least get a security officer! (2009/07/15) 

 As adaptees of these technologies, we have the right to make demands on these companies for security and privacy. Bad programming and security are clearly personal issues for me--it only takes a few bad apples who ignore good programming and security procedures to cause enormous harm globally. Going back to the mini van metaphor--would you put your family in a mini van if it put your child at risk just because it was free?

As users, we also need to be aware of our online identity is very public---both from a business perspective as well as for personal safety. When you tell folks that you on vacation or out walking the dog, while your facebook profile may not show your address, it takes only a few google keystrokes to find your address through your school affiliation, location, name or business.

It is the public nature of the web that makes it so exciting. The business and communication potential cannot be ignored and we absolutely have a say in its direction.

Second, adaptation: Better business tools on the web

At the NAWBO workshop in July, many questions centered around how does this apply to my business--you are an architect, an event planner, a tour guide, a marketing consultant...how should client interactions online be conducted? Are there better ways to track and target my communication with customers? How do I integrate services and sales with shared information? And, what happens when you fall in love with a particular social media application and in the next upgrade the features you loved no longer work? Fantastic applications have been contributed by the global community, but no one is responsible for keeping them working.

This is where it is so exciting. Remember when the fax machine was a big deal? My grandparents could not get enough of faxing letters back and forth when this came out.

And, the information? I found most of the information for this article while I was waiting at the airport. If you have read this far, how many have clicked through to Forbes, CIO magazine, the Chicago sun times? Maybe you are interested in media and have twittered Michael Netley, who teaches in Singapore. My greatest hope is that you have gone to NAWBO NYC and registered for an event (we have two coming up in social media)  or to become a member. Perhaps you need a website, a database management system or a place to host your site with my company Intracommunities, Inc.  It is possible that you got side tracked by all those links and never made it this far....but think positive!

So now what? All this information, a global database, how do we use it to grow our business? How do you reach the 22 million user universe as many of these groups have grown to be? With solid company policies and online procedures, we have an opportunity to be Julia Child in the kitchen, crafting business masterpieces, learning new recipes, and creating a new culture for our businesses. 

It is actually really important that we get engaged now rather than later. This new media in not yet rated, we have an opportunity to put our stamp on the direction of these tools now and morph it into something effective, safe and fun.

Amazing how much energy goes into keeping cool in August. I often give up on my poor ac--it works so hard and reaches a point there is just no more cool left. In the summer, I spend a lot more time reading magazines and books thinking decompression equals keeping cool. I make lots of salad, very cooling. I even signed up for Stressless Jill http://twitter.com/stressless_Jill any and all de-stress tips are welcomed when you are "trying not to let them see you sweat". In Japan, they have another approach, in August they tell ghost stories so that the "chills" may offer some relief in late night heat and it is also believed that mid-August is ghost season.

The Japanese approach may have some merit because despite all our efforts, sweat it out we do, might as well let it work for you. One day last week, my parents woke up and discovered that their dishwasher, fridge and washing machine were all broken. Only a week earlier my programmer had experienced a catastrophic power surge in his home office that took out the power supply on his main machine, gobbling (not a technical term) its two internal hard drives along with the hard-drive on our office server. Apparently, a significant power event had occurred so that others in Brooklyn had similar meltdowns. We thought that perhaps my parents had caught the gremlin of Brooklyn a week later.

Such experiences have to be contagious whether physical or psychological, right? Though, much evidence suggests that this is an August phenomenon. It could only have been in August when their Dell laptop was fried by lightening when  a strike hit the bird feeder that was over the phone wire that led to the house where their laptop was plugged into the modem. Or, perhaps it is the ghost in the machine...and the Japanese are really onto something.

When you have catastrophic power events, leaky pipes, and lightening--you know it is August offering a little saber rattling and blood letting that is a product of simultaneous heat and work.

Happy dog days of summer or early Halloween, when one-step back can be two steps forward.  When all is said and done, sweating is often the only option...but now I have inherited a new computer. The report on the Mac Pro Quad Core is that it is a "Race Truck". I can say with certainly, if you need a monitor, there are some good deals for everyone...

The good news is, yes, we all break down a bit in August and it is okay to sweat. While we should take a bit of time to put our feet up in the evening, machines require care as well:

-Keep'em cool--even at night--sorry to the green people and the pocketbook.

-Battery backup really is essential for the longevity of the machine.

-Of course, back up your data--you can replace equipment, but you cannot replace your data.

A friend invited me to attend a 90-minute workshop with her. It was a free workshop, I glimpsed at the invitation, which had markings that interested me--I saw Google, Yahoo and MSN logos, which I mistook for sponsors. I saw that the topic was learning how to make your website make money online. Always interested in what my fellow technology peers are teaching/selling, a free 90 minute education on a Saturday could not be too bad.

At least a hundred people were in attendance, dressed in their best work clothes--all looked eager. When the instructor introduced himself as John, the young man beside me said with total enthusiasm "NICE!" 

The pretty and well-known logos were not sponsors, we were watching a 90 minute pitch for a particular company (I will not mention names) that sold website templates and hosting services. "Passive residual income!" write that down we were ordered, this is what you will need when you lose your job next week. If we did not respond with enough enthusiasm he turned off the power point and stopped the lecture until he was satisfied that we understood his question---I hate it when I learn how my dog feels when I make him sit for a biscuit.

Is this information important? "YES!!!" Build a web page and sell items. Don't know what to sell--not a problem drop shippers were available to do all of this for you--jewlery, judo, bar codes, watches, you name it, sounds boring, who cares, you are making money. Get it? "YES!!!" And, just having one website is not enough, you needed multiple, why? So, you could have "MUTLIPLE PASSIVE RESIDUAL INCOMES!" 

The instructor would not lie to us, too bad, that this would not be quite enough. You also have to know how to market your website.

Suddenly, "passive residual income" was no longer passive or cheap. The website marketing workshop would be in two weeks for $499. The important proprietary SEO software cost $3600. And, I suppose each of your ecommerce pages would require its own proprietary software. Luckily for us, if we signed up today, we would get a discount on the $3600. How much could only be disclosed at the coming workshop‑whose date and location I did not write down because I was told not to.

Did we know how much Amazon.com and Barnesandnoble.com paid outsourced companies to manage their ecommerce properties?! While this was not a crowd that could afford $499,  the audience knew this workshop information was critical.

Just as we felt entirely suckered, no worries, it was our lucky day. The biscuit came out again. If we pay today, we were told we would get the $499 Internet marketing workshop for $48, plus a $199 website free, and one month hosting free. And, when we were told today, he meant, right now. Out came the credit card forms and card swipes.

My friend turned to me and said that she hated when people made you pay before they had handed out the information regarding what you were paying for. What if you wanted the workshop and not the website?....No questions would be answered until the cards were swiped.

We had been warned, at the beginning of the workshop, several minutes were spent explaining that this company did not want us for just one purchase--one book or one video. 

Look at the table in front and in the back, no books, no videos--nothing was being sold to us today because this company did not want a one-time purchase, they wanted multiple charges made to us for hopefully at least a decade.

Great--and this company is loving its own online recurring billing payment gateway and can keep billing you $24.95 a month until you cried stop loud enough. And charge they did.

I did check out the company and found lots of complaints, but they did have customers using their online stores--more like an online lemonade stand...or with the drop ship services perhaps more akin to the fruit consortiums you find on every street corner in New York. Based on the fees customers claimed, a fruit consortium is probably their vision--give away a penny for every 50 cent banana sold.

Total $199 + $24.95 x 12 + $3600 + unknown fees = $4000 +. As I searched for information about the company, most people quoted their experience at about $6000--the going rate for an online fruit stall--sets the market standard for bottom basement ecommerce.

Somebody would be getting passive residual income that day and it would not be any of us in the room.  My friend and I could not wait for the non-apple ipod. We needed the fresh air of Herald Square.

Beware of the biscuit.

Typically, you plot your course for the day as a series of targets to be hit and completed. Typically, this is not how the day evolves. At first, this makes you sad, but then you think of all the new events that popped up which are now more targets for your basket and you are glad.

In the world of databases, the data that you collect is also not straight forward--rarely does it fit neatly into the forms we create and lots of information gets lost as a result.

My programmers have always referred to the n dimensional database structures. Basically, information can link sets of facts infinitely. For example, when a sales database captures a sales transaction it links sets of facts to the customer such as date, type of transactions, items in transactions, maybe even all the customer search requests that led to the transaction. A great explanation by Mike Whitehorm describes how this works very clearly in database expert article.

Now, while I go to walk my dog in Union Square I try to think n dimensionally. What sets of data are created by my encounters with a few dozen strangers everyday that tell my story? If you google n dimensions, with the exception of Mr. Whitehorn, you will be awash in mathematical theory--Euclidean space, hyperspheres, multiple dimensions, string theory... The model that represents all the different facets of relationships that develop from a contact is not a construct that can be easily applied to a two dimensional flowchart, it is spherical and it is not fixed. If you bring in the arena of quantum physics, interactions are more complex than we even realize. Next time you network and exchange business cards, watch the firework explosion of data bits.

The potential of data collection overload may seem overwhelming, but it is also very exciting because it makes you have to look at the potential of each piece of the puzzle as it applies to your business or your personal life. When it comes time to redo that member database and you feel limited by its contents and think about data strategy--go beyond the power point presentation that you were going to make, past the excel spreadsheet, think greater than filemaker, and, hurrah, don't even worry about access---think in n dimesions.  Data, like life, need not be linear or 2-dimensional and neither does your business strategy. When you see the ball twirling in your head, call your programmer and create your vision.